his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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