I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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