I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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