Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
