Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
