Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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