I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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