He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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