if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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