I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
