you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize