Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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