I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
no, he came in my armpit
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize