Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
