I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize