jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i dont even know how to be here
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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