I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
