I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize