they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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