so explain again why im purple
no
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
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