Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
