im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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