the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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