Please, let me fuck your mom
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
vagina is talking i cant
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
