I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed