Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
