just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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