How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
sex in a hospital.. check
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
