he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize