did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
