i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
