he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
