I heard we made out
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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