After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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