similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize