hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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