You can't motorboat a personality
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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