This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Randomize
