I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
