really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
