but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
