he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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