It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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