Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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