Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
don't judge my taste in strippers
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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