Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
