I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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