And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
