You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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