You're a womanizer and a bitch.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize